Misunderstood Church | The Catholic Realist

Nope, That’s Not Why I’m Catholic (Part 3: I Actually AM Edumacated)

Posted on February 21, 2012 by ymkbird

So in this series of blogs, I’ve been outlining all the faulty assumptions the non-Catholic or anti-Catholic people I know have about what I choose this faith for my own…and I’ve saved the best for last. Of course, by “best,” I mean the one I don’t handle well.

When it comes to “You’re only Catholic because you were raised that way,” I can usually respond intelligently with a discussion about human development and nature vs. nurture. When it comes to “You’re only Catholic because you’re afraid to go to hell,” I have no problem calmly explaining the bigger picture (Love) that they’re missing.

However, when it comes to the subject of this post:

You’re only Catholic because you don’t know how to think critically.

…or any of it’s cousins including “because you aren’t educated”, “because you just don’t know better” or “because you’ve never bothered to think for yourself,” I have a hard time keeping my calm, cool, and reasonable demeanor and start seeing red.

What I felt like doing after recently reading this line on my Facebook wall.

You see, I’m actually a very well-educated individual, and that education was not “sheltered.” Yes, I did attend Catholic school for Elementary and High School (Middle School was public), but then I went to a public university where I majored in English and minored in Spanish and…wait for it…Religious Studies.

Nope, That’s NOT Why I’m Catholic (Part 2: Love is in the air)

Posted on February 14, 2012 by ymkbird

In my part one, I mentioned that the firestorm of debate that the HHS Mandate has created encouraged a number of conversations with people who are not Catholic or Christian…with atheists, with Satanists, with agnostics…with those who outright hate organized religion and those who are just suspicious of it.

Some of those conversations have been openly hostile, others have been vaguely mocking, and a few have been even curious, but there’s one thing they all have in common. They all have made (faulty) assumptions about why I am a Catholic.

So, I’m here to set the record straight…

You’re Only Catholic Because You’re Afraid You’re Going to Hell

Going to Hell This is a pretty common argument from those who reject religion outright. Here is one example from a discussion with an old college coworker (who at least at that time was a self-professed Satanist) on his blog:

The Catholic Church holds itself as the moral standard bearer for the world because it gains its authority from the divine. These rules are not up for a vote or appeal. If its rules are not followed, the sinner is punished in the afterlife. This is coercion not unlike someone giving orders at gunpoint. It negates the possibility of free will.

Or this comment on one of my Facebook posts by a really close friend. We usually avoid religious discussions, and though he likes to poke fun and provoke me, it’s all in respect and love (I hope).

Well I was going to get a vasectomy but knowing the Church is against it and that Jesus won’t let me into the kingdom of heaven if I do, I’m just going to abstain going forward!

It’s a pretty common argument that assumes that the reason I follow the Church’s teachings or even believe at all is based on my fear of eternal consequences if I don’t.

Just like the “You’re Only Catholic Because You Were Raised That Way” argument, this assumption has some basis in truth, but is missing a much bigger picture. In honor of Valentine’s Day, here’s an analogy that explains that bigger picture…

Nope, That’s NOT Why I’m Catholic (Part 1)

Posted on February 11, 2012 by ymkbird

Throughout the past few weeks, I’ve had a number of conversations with people who are not Catholic or Christian…with atheists, with Satanists, with agnostics…with those who outright hate organized religion and those who are just suspicious of it.

So, I’m here to set the record straight…in my next few blog posts I’m going to share my truth behind the many misunderstandings that have been leveled at me.

“You’re Only Catholic Because You Were Raised That Way”

It’s true I am a cradle Catholic. My mom was raised by a strong Catholic family and I find myself still learning from the lessons she learned at the faithful, loving hands of my grandfather. My dad converted to Catholicism (from “nothingism”) after I was born. They were not perfect parents, but they demonstrated (and continue to demonstrate) for me more than just what it means to be Catholic – they have shown me what it means to be a good person, a happy person.

But wasn't I a cute Cradle Catholic??

I teach Confirmation and one of the most common themes that teenagers are taught during the preparation for this sacrament is that it’s the moment when they become an “adult” in the Church. Confirmation, they’re told, is the time when they choose for themselves the faith that they’ve been taught by their parents, godparents, and others. I think – and have told my Confirmation teens – that this is a line of bull. There is no magic moment when you become an adult in the Church – and there certainly is not one moment when you can separate yourself from the teachings of your parents and be Catholic all by yourself. Here’s why:

We can’t separate ourselves from our history.

Hell hath frosted over

Posted on February 6, 2012 by chriskmn

Hell must have frozen over because I have seen some things lately that probably indicate the end times are near. Let me explain.

I was running a retreat at a neighboring parish this weekend. It was one of those required one day confirmation retreats that try to give a retreat experience to those last 10% of kids who haven’t done a retreat yet. Nothing wrong with these teens, we love them, and it seems like church may not be the most important thing in their life. I think you get what I am saying.

At the end of the retreat we did a reconciliation service in the beautiful side chapel of the parish. At this parish, the tabernacle was kept in this side chapel, which was great for us; we got to pray before the Blessed Sacrament while preparing or praying through our penances. About 40 minutes into our prayer time, this little old lady comes into the chapel and walks before the tabernacle. She genuflects, takes the tabernacle key from its hiding spot and begins to open the tabernacle.

Honestly, it was a bit of a shock. We had just spent all this time praying to Jesus who was stuck inside his tent, and all of a sudden, the tent flaps were opening and Jesus was coming out. A crazy thing happened next. As I went to kneel, the entire room started moving from their various positions of repose (laying, sitting, leaning), and knelt while Jesus in the Eucharist was removed and moved into the main church in preparation for Mass. It was a moment. There was a palpable change in the room. The whispering teens stopped chatting. The sleeping teens awoke. The teens reading a Bible out of boredom paid attention. Seriously, it was miracle akin to Jesus appearing to the disciples after the resurrection.

I was moved. Read More

The Miraculous Desk Plant of Chris Kostelc

Posted on February 2, 2012 by chriskmn

This is my desk plant. My wife bought me this plant while on a visit to Ikea almost 3 years ago, and it has sat in that place on my desk since. For the most part, it is green and lush and happy, which makes me happy. Also, this is a miracle plant. It is a miracle it is still alive because I am a notorious plant killer. This is plant number 3 for me, and so, everyday it remains more than a brown husk is a win. Honestly, I rarely remember to water, and then when I do, I go on a bender and water with a fire hose till I have drowned the thing (okay slight exaggeration).

Needless to say, I proud of my little plant that could. I have brought it back from the edge of death so many times, I have thought about naming it Lazarus. (Then I remember it is a plant and come to my senses; talking to plants is foolish.) The little leafy beast has come back from death so many times that honestly it has become a mini reminder of life in the face of death. I live in Minnesota where I don’t see a green leaf or blade of grass for about 5 months out of the year. The little green thing in my office reminds me that soon the world will be resurrected in springtime and life will return to this barren tundra. As silly as it sounds, my office plant reminds me of the paschal mystery, resurrection, my salvation, and the good news of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Really? Yes really. Read More

B16 explains why I baptized my kids

Posted on January 25, 2012 by chriskmn

I read this amazing quote from Benedict XVI and had to share:

“What happens in Baptism? What do we hope for from Baptism? You have given a response on the threshold of this Chapel: We hope for eternal life for our children. This is the purpose of Baptism. But how can it be obtained? How can Baptism offer eternal life? What is eternal life?

In simpler words, we might say: we hope for a good life, the true life, for these children of ours; and also for happiness in a future that is still unknown. We are unable to guarantee this gift for the entire span of the unknown future, so we turn to the Lord to obtain this gift from him.

We can give two replies to the question, “How will this happen?”. This is the first one: through Baptism each child is inserted into a gathering of friends who never abandon him in life or in death because these companions are God’s family, which in itself bears the promise of eternity.

This group of friends, this family of God, into which the child is now admitted, will always accompany him, even on days of suffering and in life’s dark nights; it will give him consolation, comfort and light.

This companionship, this family, will give him words of eternal life, words of light in response to the great challenges of life, and will point out to him the right path to take. This group will also offer the child consolation and comfort, and God’s love when death is at hand, in the dark valley of death. It will give him friendship, it will give him life. And these totally trustworthy companions will never disappear.

No one of us knows what will happen on our planet, Read More

Rethinking the Pro-Life Goal

Posted on January 24, 2012 by ymkbird

In honor of the March for Life in Washington DC yesterday, I posted the following on Twitter:

No matter how you feel about the morality or legality of it, we can all agree: we NEED less abortions in our country. #MarchforLife.

@Falsum, a Canadian grad student in Scotland, responded:

Glad to have common ground with a pro-lifer. Does this mean you support expanded access to contraception and comprehensive sex ed?

I knew there was no way I could answer his question in 140 characters because it’s so much more complicated than a simple “yes” or “no.” We danced around each other quoting competing scientific studies, but not really getting anywhere – in part, I think because of the limitations of Twitter. My thoughts on his question and this issue are way too complicated for Twitter.

It’s complicated because I think that when it comes to the issues of abortion, contraception, sexual morality, etc most pro-life advocates are missing the boat in a very fundamental way: We’ve got the wrong goal.